"I just don't understand how you can be non-binary-gendered. That is, not female or male." »
I want you to lie for me. If you’re a woman, say “I am a man.” If you’re a man, say “I am a woman.” Say it out loud. Say it to your reflection. Do you feel that little disconnect there, where the sentiment you’re articulating doesn’t match up with the reality you experience? You know you’re lying. Even if someone else comes up and says “Hey! That’s right! That’s definitely what you are,” you will still know you’re lying.
I can’t speak for everyone, but that’s what happens to me when I try to place myself as either male or female. I could stand up and say “I am a man,” and know, to my bones, that I was lying. Just as I’d be lying if I said “I am a woman.”
It’s not a matter of thinking, “I can’t be a man/woman if I want to do or like these things.” I know that as a woman, I could still have a career, join the military, roughhouse, be athletic, be great at science – all those stereotypically male things. I know that as a man, I could still stay at home, raise kids, bake, knit, show my emotions easily and often – all those stereotypically female things. My gender identity is not about what I want to do, it’s about who I am.
This is not a new idea. Cultures across the globe have acknowledged more than two genders, from the Middle Kingdom of Egypt to the Lakota of North America, from Mayan civilization to the Siberian Chuckhi. References to persons neither male nor female date back to some of humanity’s most ancient written records, such as the Sumerian creation myth, and survive in seminal religious texts such as the Ramayana and the Halakha.
If you want to learn more, the citation list on Wikipedia’s article on “Third gender” has links and references to scholarly articles, books, studies, and excerpts which might help you get an idea of the nature and history of various non-binary identities. Or you can look at more contemporary accounts, such as Neutrois.com, or the discussion on AVEN’s site on “What it feels like to be trans, genderqueer or genderless”. Remember that no single narrative will be able to represent all people, and different nonbinary people may have different preferred terms, explanations, and experiences.
(via neutrois)
Edited to add: If you missed the show, you can now listen to the entire thing on the programme page.
Two nonbinary.org contributors will be interviewed for this online radio show:
gqid:
Is It a Boy or a Girl? Improving Media Coverage Beyond the Binary
Sunday, March 25 10:00 a.m. to 11:30 a.m. ET
Join us for a radio-style program on how the media covers non-binary and non-conforming gender and what we can do to make that coverage better.
Hosted by Avory Faucette of QueerFeminism.com and Radically Queer, and featuring guests with expertise in gender-neutral parenting, non-binary identities, and media coverage of transgender issues, we’ll be looking closely at some misunderstandings the media makes and how feminists can take action to educate and improve coverage. We’ll consider topics including major media coverage of gender-neutral parenting and education in 2011, the media’s refusal to take supermodel Andrej Pejic’s stated identity seriously, and what articles on genderqueer and other identities get right and wrong. We’ll also be talking about the best way to cover less familiar gender identities, how journalists can describe gender in a way that is less harmful to non-binary or questioning individuals, and how blogs and social media are changing the conversation.
Guests will be:
Arwyn Daemyir, creator of Raising My Boychick;Marilyn Roxie, creator of Genderqueer Identities and intern at the Center for Sex & Culture;Gunner Scott, Director of the Massachusetts Transgender Political Coalition;Nat Titman, creator of Practical Androgyny and the Nonbinary.org wikiTo tune in, join us from your computer at 10 am EST on Sunday, March 25. A live stream of the show will appear when we start. You’ll be able to ask questions or chat about the show in the chat room on that page or call in with a question using the guest call-in number listed there. We hope you’ll join the conversation!
This event is part of WAM! It Yourself 2012, a multi-city event by Women, Action & the Media. For more information about events happening all over the world, check here or email Lexi.
Practical Androgyny: Androgynous model sought for London-based project »
Signal boosting. This project could produce valuable nonbinary visibility materials:
Practical Androgyny has been contacted by Charlotte, a photographer working with a student from the London College of Fashion on a not-for-profit project that aims to challenge people’s perceptions of gender. If you’re in the London area or able to travel there, and you’re of androgynous appearance, please consider volunteering to model for the photoshoot. No experience required.
Our project explores the way that we perceive positions of political power. We will be be portraying a fictional presidential figure in a way that challenges people’s assumptions about gender.
We’re looking to explore the way that traditional images of powerful political figures could be subverted to show a future where ‘the president’ appears to be androgynous - or in some way not fitting in with most people’s expectations of binary gender. We’re looking for someone who could wear the traditional uniform of presidential power (i.e. a smart, dark suit) and present as an extremely attractive individual, without giving the usual cues as to their gender. We’ll be working with a stylist and a makeup artist to achieve the right look, with our model looking as natural as possible.
We’re heavily influenced by models like Andrej Pejic and we’d like to envisage a time where people who subvert the gender norm are in public positions outside the fashion world.
We’re going to shoot on Friday 24th or Saturday 25th of this month in South London and unfortunately, we can’t offer payment or travel expenses. Everyone involved is working on a time-for-images basis, so you’ll get copies of all the final images to use as you see fit.
We very much want to make the best use of the photographs and we are hoping to have them accompany a piece on gender identity for publication and we’d like to offer the whole thing to a magazine as a package on a not-for-profit basis. You need to be comfortable with this and you’ll be asked to sign a standard model release.
If you’re interested in the project and you think the way you look might fit with our creative vision, please send some recent photos to charlotte<at>lyope<dot>com
Please reblog and signal boost this request.
Nonbinary gender identity and expression outside of the transgender community
As part of a nonbinary gender visibility project, I’m attempting to track down people who identify and/or express gender outside of the binary (as in something other than woman or man) despite not being involved in mainstream trans* communities.
I’m mainly active in transgender, transsexual and genderqueer communities and, as you’d expect, I know of many nonbinary people through those. These are communities that are primarily about gender transgression (of various kinds) where nonbinary experience is directly on topic.
I’m also active in various queer and (a)sexuality-based communities, most notably the asexual and bi communities and have found those to be supportive of nonbinary identity and expression, and so good places to meet others who don’t fit binary classifications. These are communities that are about sexuality that defies the hetero/homo binary and so tend to be either extremely openminded to nonbinary gender or see it as an overlapping issue. (The pansexual community would obviously fall here too).
And I feel at home and accepted as a nonbinary person at (most) literary science fiction conventions I attend (and other cons with similar feels). There (trans)gender isn’t (usually) the topic of discussion, but members of the community are generally openminded to new ideas and other ways of being, and of course there’s no shortage of science fiction that plays with gender or imagines different models of sex and gender. So this can be seen as part of a third category of community that isn’t about or related to gender transgression, but is open minded and accepting of those expressing a nonbinary gender.
Those are my experiences. What I’m now interested in doing is assembling a list of other communities where people express and find acceptance of their nonbinary genders, preferably those that are not directly related to ‘mainstream’ transgender, genderqueer and transsexual communities.
Based on my research and feedback from others, I’ve assembled the following list of communities that are (or may be) directly related to, or supportive of, nonbinary gender (which again, I’m defining as identifying or living as something other than a woman or a man):
- Intersex support groups and activist organisations
- Transvestite and crossdresser communities (those not following mainstream transgender narratives of gender identity and dysphoria)
- Butch/Femme
- Radical faeries
- The eunuch and castration communities
- Extreme body modification
- Kink and fetish communities
- Drag and cabaret performer communities
- Artist communities, particularly performance art (Burning Man?)
- Empowered multiplicity/plurality/median/mid-continuum
- Otherkin
- Female bodybuilders (perhaps? Cited as gender transgressive in Feinberg’s Trans Liberation)
- Goth and similar subcultures (Twitter suggestion)
- Certain parts of the pagan community (Twitter suggestion)
(And I should stress, I’m not saying everyone within these communities is nonbinary, any more than I’m suggesting everyone within the trans* community is, just that they may well be home to some people who see themselves as something other than women or men).
Can anyone reading point me towards nonbinary individuals from those communities, or to articles written (or documentaries filmed!) about nonbinary gender within them?
Or can anyone suggest any other communities/subcultures that haven’t been suggested yet that are home to or accepting of people who identify or live as something other than male or female?
I’ve created a page on the nonbinary.org wiki for further examples and supporting information to be recorded. Please comment here or make edits there to add your suggestions and examples:
Nonbinary gender outside of the transgender community
* The asterisk at the end of ‘trans*’ denotes that this is the wider inclusive form of trans that includes all transgender, transsexual, nonbinary, genderqueer, gender variant and gender nonconforming people regardless of gender identity or expression.
Just colored the “gender planet” page, our extended metaphor to describe to folks how the words transgender and cisgender are typically used. I love this thought, and it was fun to come up with gender slash geography puns. Enjoy and please send any feedback our way!
-mel, the artist
Today is UK trans* activist organisation Trans Media Action’s Trans Camp event, bringing media and IT professionals together with trans* people to make positive change.
As part of the preparations, trans* people from across the UK were asked to give one minute video responses on the topics of childhood, media, comedy and family.
This is my response to the question of media representation. As a nonbinary person I felt erased or misrepresented by recent media coverage…
I’m nonbinary, that means I live as something other than a woman or a man. It also means I have next to no representation in the media.
Even in documentaries featuring trans* people with genderqueer or gender binary challenging identities or histories, like some of the participants in My Transsexual Summer, these are simplified, glossed over or completely edited out in fear of ‘confusing’ the general public.
If my life experiences are ever touched upon, they’re simplified to the point of misrepresentation. If I’m to be hinted at, it’s in the suggestion that some people are ‘in between’.
My gender and my body are not ‘between’ anything. My gender is not a balancing act. I’m not in the middle ground, I haven’t gone halfway and stopped. I am not half a woman and half a man, I’m not following two sets of sexist stereotypes. I do not ‘pick and choose’ about gender. And I’m not ‘on the fence’. And I’ve definitely not ‘de-transitioned’.
I’m a trans* person, I’m doing what I need to do to be true to myself.
Of course not all nonbinary people object to being described as ‘in between’; that’s an accurate description of some people’s gender identities. But there are many more people besides me whose experiences of being agender, bigender, fluid gender, genderqueer etc are erased by that simplification.
In my case, I experienced gender dysphoria and I did what it was necessary to do to become comfortable with my body. Doing so didn’t fix my social dysphoria though. I tried to be a ‘classic transsexual’, I tried to pretend to be a gender I didn’t truly feel I was. But I found ‘passing’ made me just as socially dysphoric as my assigned gender role had done.
It turned out that transition just wasn’t the perfect ‘package deal’ I’d been sold in the brochure, I had to go off the beaten track to find my own way to authentically express myself to the world.
It would be nice to see this represented in the media at all, especially on TV shows where some of the participants have similar feelings.
(And no, ‘androgyny’ and ‘androgyne’ don’t have to mean ‘in between’; the dictionary definition boils down to ‘having both male and female traits’, and anyway that’s my appearance not my gender).
Trans Camp: UK Trans Media Action needs your videos »
The UK trans* activist organisation Trans Media Action is running Trans Camp on January 13th at the offices of Channel 4.
Trans Camp will bring together trans* people, developers, designers and innovators to come up with ideas to improve the lives of trans* people using web technologies and the media.
In order to make sure the widest range of experiences are covered, they’re looking for one minute video responses from trans* people around the UK explaining their experiences:
Although around half of the participants will be trans there will also be people there who have never knowingly come across a trans person.
So, we want your short video responses to one or more of these questions. You can use your phone, webcam or something fancier – it doesn’t matter as long as we can hear you and see you (or whatever you choose to film while you’re speaking or subtitling.)
Your videos will be played at Channel 4 on 13th January to the participants of Trans Camp. They will also be put together on a website for people to see in the run up to the camp and afterwards. Your videos will be public so you must be sure you’re happy for them to be seen by anyone online.
Why? We want to give those who are new to trans issues an idea of the diversity within the trans community. We want to bring to life some of the questions we’re asking with real people’s voices.
QUESTIONS: Answer ONE* question per video – max 1 minute
- CHILDHOOD: For those of you who knew, what was it like growing up as a trans child?
- MEDIA: How does media coverage of trans people affect you?
- COMEDY: How do comedy portrayals of trans people affect you?
- FAMILY: How have you experienced support, or lack of, from family and friends?
*You can answer more than one question if you like, just make a separate video.
If you’re in the United Kingdom and trans* nonbinary, genderqueer or otherwise gender variant or gender nonconforming, please consider submitting a video to make sure the full diversity of trans* experiences are represented in this important project.
Full instructions on how to submit your video responses
* The asterisk at the end of ‘trans*’ denotes that this is the wider inclusive form of trans that includes all transgender, transsexual, nonbinary, genderqueer, gender variant and gender nonconforming people regardless of gender identity or expression.
Nonbinary.org Wiki »
New year, new web presence! Nonbinary.org now hosts a nonbinary gender community wiki with forums coming soon!
Get involved by expanding stub articles or creating wanted pages.
Radically Queer: 11/27 #transchat recap »
The first of a new regular #transchat discussion took place on Twitter today, initially discussing the concept of ‘stealth’, being out, disclosure, openness and privacy around trans* identities and histories. People with a varied range of experiences contributed, including several nonbinary and genderqueer people.
This week we focused on the concept of “stealth,” with related topics like coming out, passing, and the relationship between gender expression and how others perceive an individual’s gender/gender identity.
We started by trying to define “stealth,” and realized that though the term has a mostly-negative connotation for most people, it has different meanings. ”Stealth” can be used by cis people as an accusation that implies a duty to disclose, particularly in sexual/romantic situations. It also is used by some trans people, though, to indicate a breaking of community ties with the trans community.
…
Another question that came up a lot is what “stealth” or “passing” means for non-binary people.
queernetic I’m nonbinary. “Stealth” for me is “passing” as my assigned gender. I have no socially recognized gender to “pass” as. #transchat
quarridors #transchat I think there are two issues here, disclosing details of ones assignment at birth/medical history and being ‘out’ as transgender.
queerscholar @quarridors @Helenarth I’ve started doing this more in some circles, very out about GQ but downplaying what’s in my pants etc #transchat
quarridors @queerscholar I don’t discuss my transsexual medical history or my birth assignment, barring that I consider them to be private. #transchat
quarridors @queerscholar As a nonbinary/genderqueer person I’m still able to enjoy the benefits of being openly trans* and in the community. #transchat
whateversusan Passing, stealth, out, these are words that don’t really adapt well to nonbinary and nontraditional experiences #transchat
Some of us also expressed difficulties being “out,” even when we want to be, while others find it easier:
whateversusan @queerscholar Right, exactly. If I want to be out as gay, I kiss my wife in public. But as trans? What do I do? Drop my voice? #transchat
SmartAssJen Since I’m just starting transition & am gendered as male by others, I claim trans status to explain variant gender markers. #transchat
whateversusan @SmartAssJen I’m on the other side, I transitioned and am always gendered female. Hard to know how to be out as trans*. #transchat
quarridors #transchat I am pretty comfortably androgynous, I get a mixture of readings, people changing their mind on my gender mid-conversation etc…
melballoons @queerscholar Well, I’m seen as female b/c femme (and politically so) and I don’t want to give that up to be seen. It’s difficult #transchat
queerscholar I really WANT people to perceive my femme-ness as transgressive, but they miss the queerness of it. #transchat
whateversusan @queerscholar I am slowly starting to be more butch again now that I’m less twitchy about things! TransW butch = transgressive #transchat
quarridors #transchat I feel the most comfortable with my gender presentation when I’m widely out as transgender, rather than when I let people assume.
quarridors #transchat But as a nonbinary person I can do that without explicitly disclosing what my birth assignment or medical history were…
quarridors #transchat So I can be ‘stealth’ while also ‘out’, does that show those are totally separate things or am I a special case confusing things?
queerpup As a pretty binary FtM that “passes”, I still feel a need to be out - acknowledging my upbringing & female socialisation. #transchat
AutistLiam @queerscholar @quarridors I am lucky enough to have spaces and people who can see me as male and as trans at the same time #transchat
melballoons I do think that being “out” may bring unwanted attention to assigned gender. Could be triggering and cause dysphoria. Be mindful. #transchat
Unfortunately, policing of gender is common in the trans community, not just in the wider world:
AutumnSandeen #transchat I’ve been cyberharassed by two “women of operative history” this year for being out identified as #transgender & #transsexual.
quarridors #transchat I think that queer/trans* communities are surprisingly prone to assuming things about genderqueer people’s bodies and histories
janetmock @autumnsandeen The policing of one another’s self-identification is a disease in our community. #transchat
janetmock I’ve been criticized for using transgender/transsexual in my own identification, when in fact I grew up mahuwahine in Hawaii. #transchat
quarridors #transchat I also know people who the system & parts of the community call ‘detransitioners’ who still ID as trans* or continue to take HRT.
melballoons @auntysarah I work in a queer space where I constantly have to remind and am constantly misgendered. It’s triggers dysphoria. #transchat
And that’s just some of what we discussed during this week’s #transchat! Check out the#transchat hashtag if you’d like to see some of the other topics that came up, including self-care and activism, trans art, and when to ask for preferred pronouns. And join us Sunday, December 11 from 2-4 pm EST for the next #transchat on Twitter. We’ll be discussion trans* sexuality, and possibly other topics as well—if you have topic suggestions, you can shoot them to me here or @queerscholar. Also let me know if the time doesn’t work out, as we’re still ironing out practicalities.
Survey of nonbinary trans* people's pronoun preferences - Ends soon! »
Signal boosting, and looking forward to reading the results:
The survey’s been open for just about six months now, and responses have trickled to just about none, so I will close it a little earlier than the previously planned 31 December. Currently there are about 475 responses! But in case any interested nonbinary trans folks just haven’t seen it yet, I’m making this announcement, and will close the survey this coming Monday the 21st at 11 PM EST.
If you identify as trans* and nonbinary, I’d love to see your input!
